Today you’re going to learn the easiest self defense rule in the book. This one rule will keep 95% of shit out of your life.
There are plenty of self defense shortcuts. They’re easy to understand. They’re simple to apply in your life. But they’re not always easy to apply – because sometimes you won’t want to apply the self defense shortcut. Sometimes it’s easier, more convenient, to ignore your safety.
Simplest self defense rules
Here it is:
Don’t do Stupid stuff, with Stupid people, in Stupid places, at Stupid times of day.
The 4 Stupids. Any one of these can land you in shit. Combining 2 or more can even guarantee it.
This picture, for example, is a complete lie:
Going into known gang turf and making fun of their gang.
Challenging the school’s biggest jock.
Getting into a relationship with an emotionally unstable nut-job.
Letting yourself get drunk in places where you can do Stupid shit, if you know that you’re prone to doing Stupid shit when drunk.
While things can seem like a good idea at the time, if you had to think it through in advance you’d probably realise “This is Stupid shit!” Case in point:
I.e. the antidote to doing Stupid Shit is to think through your actions and decisions. In other words – self responsibility is key.
Unfortunately most people out there yearn for childhood. They think they want no responsibilities (bills, job, cooking, cleaning). What they really want is no consequences.
You’ve got this friend. Every time you go out drinking he gets stupid and drags you into whatever mess he creates. You know the type – that “asshole buddy” who’s funny as shit but always starts a fight.
Or (for female readers) that daddy-issues friend who always gets drunk and starts making out with the biggest asshole at the bar – and you’ve got to drag her slutty-clothes-wearing ass back home and out of trouble when, surprise, he turns out to be an asshole.
The problem is that Stupid people can be really fun. At least up until the shit hits the fan.
The fix – suck it up and avoid them when necessary.
If you have trouble saying “No.” If you want to go out with your trouble-causing friend because they’re fun to be with. Well then I have good news pumpkin. We can control what we desire and how we feel about things (if you know the right tools). Don’t tell yourself how fun it could be. Tell yourself stories about the consequences. Describe Stupid people in terms of the shit they bring into your life.
We all know the Stupid places. Gang areas. Certain bars. Open parties after a certain time of night (when the energy of the party shifts). Lonely ATMs.
You know the shitty areas in your town. Don’t go there without (very good) reason.
The temptation is that often, “Stupid places” can be the fun, edgy places. Well, maybe not the boring ATM, but the others.
That new club where 3 people got stabbed last weekend, but where all the cool kids go. Stupid place, but tempting. Especially when you see how the women there dress.
The summary for “Stupid places” is: Fringe Areas and places where people get their minds altered (drugs, booze).
An ATM is fine at rush hour when everyone’s leaving/going to work and there are a ton of people about (we’ll ignore pickpockets for this one). But going there at 2 a.m. might not be the best idea.
The world is not static. Some place perfectly safe at 9:30 in the morning is a different place around midnight.
A club can be safe at 1:30 in the morning when it’s open and business is pumping. But the industrial area it’s in isn’t so great at 5 in the evening on a lonely Sunday.
Any 1, or a combination
Any 1 of these “Stupids” can make a perfectly safe situation turn bad. Combinations are even worse.
If you’re the problem?
And if you’re the stupid person dragging his friends to stupid places at stupid times of day and doing stupid stuff? Don’t be an